Wednesday, December 21, 2011


Whatever time you live in, it seems that there are always some folks looking forward to the end of the world, folks who might have done better with the world they were given than to wind up with a headful of Armageddon. Those are the kind of folks who for example promote and look forward to December 21, 2012, a year from today, when the Mayan calendar will end (only because there are no Mayans around to extend it). According to the eager Armageddans, that will also mark end the world. Then they can live out their dream of laughing a righteous 'I told you so!' as they too vaporize.

In contrast, the mellow folks whose lives are considerately guided by that diminishing commodity known as common sense keep trying to explain to the worldflamers that 2012 as a date in this context is no more portentous than May 21, 2011 was. Fact is that of course the Mayans didn't know any more than anyone else when the world is going to end.

When they founded their kingdom and were working out their way-admirable calendar, they said at the imperial calendar council 'What's a good time to start an undending dynasty? What do we need here? When shall we have begun?' After mulling over all the recollections of what some great-great grandfathers were said to have said, they reached that earliest edge of their history, settled on an arbitrary time point further back in the local-time fog (sidenote: place/time points with no physical record are historically/religiously favored for dynastic startups). So the guy in the third seat to the left of the chairman said '730 years ago or so would be good, that fits nicely, better than 200 years ago for sure,' so that's what they did. And that's why the world will end in a year precisely.

Does that include the IRS, I wonder...


Deb said...

Ladies and gentlemen, this is your Reality Crew speaking; As foretold by the Mayan calender, the universe is one year away from its final destination, where this reality will terminate.

Please prepare to vacate the universe. Return all matter to its pre-atomic state, and place any leftover dark matter in the black holes provided. If you require any of your checkpoint procedures to be recorded as string theory equations, please collect and retain any dimensions you require beyond the third.

To exchange any remaining Time as Space you must complete the Time Return Form E=MC2. If you have not been issued with a Time Return Form this is an illusion caused by your limited dimensionality. Relax, and an authorized time collection agent will have been visiting you.

On behalf of our parent company, Cosmic Creations Unlimited, and our Earth Ground Crew, the Mayans, we hope you have enjoyed your stay in this reality and would choose to participate in an inexplicable and random expression of spontaneously generated space-time in what, for want of a better term, we shall call "the future".

(It's going around. I know not the source but found it amusing.)

Kalei's Best Friend said...

You know the answer to the IRS