ADVENTURES IN THE DMV

To give innocents abroad an idea of the degree of control bureaucracy has over the populace in Japan, on the multi-layered postcard (!) the Japanese Department of Motor Vehicles mails out to drivers to remind them it's time to renew their licenses (!), one is told the very HALF-HOUR in which one is to present oneself at the DMV office! Today, therefore, Echo and I (both born in November; licenses expire in birthmonth) spent the entire day renewing our drivers licenses, as is the way in Japan.

I, however, being without stain insofar as driving is concerned (no tickets, no accidents since last license), have this year been designated a 'well-mannered driver' as the forms so quaintly put it, a quaintness that conveys the twilight zone in which Japanese bureaucracy yet abides. At the DMV, being among the traffically virginal I was placed in the quick-through group, and only had to stand in line, fill out forms, stand in line, pay some money, stand in line, take an eye test, stand in line, get photographed to look like a DWI mug shot on my license, stand in line, fill out forms, watch a video, get a lecture, stand in line and receive at last my Gold License (awarded only to well-mannered drivers such as myself)-- about an hour and a half all told.

Echo, on the other hand, having been cited some years ago for not coming to a complete halt at a rustic stop sign where there hasn't been any cross traffic for the better part of the last century, was included with the Hell's Angels group, and was in there all afternoon getting the full treatment, lectured at and being shown all sorts of gory accident pictures, screeching brakes and all. She emerged among the hot-rod hordes with the plain and unimpressive common license they administer to all the ill-mannered drivers.

Until the government pointed it out, I'd never thought of Echo that way. Just goes to show you what a little bureaucracy can do.