DC RUMOR: MADONNA TO PERFORM IN IRAN?

Whispers in Washington have it that, in response to the philosophically meandering letter recently received from Iran's president, the White House is asking Madonna to whip up an "Immaterial Girl" show to be performed in the Majlis - featuring a new song entitled "Like 70 Virgins" - for the President, the Mullahs and their many Taliban visitors.

According to an occasionally reliable inside source, "she’ll have to wear a burqa, maybe a red one if we can get anything that racy past the censors. This will be a unique opportunity for someone of Madonna's -- caliber to perform in Iran; and since she'll be completely invisible, she won't actually have to be there in person! This is all on a par with current relations between the two countries anyway, and for any performer of Madonna's -- caliber, not being in Iran is always a pleasure.

She can stay home and relax, just have a trained stand-in fly to Tehran and go through the moves inside the burqa. Who's to know?"

It all seems a bit far-fetched to me, though...